Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Perpetual wrinkle

Must frown = confusion?

Can't a frown mean an act of trying to remember, must it always mean we're confused?

Grinning Goat at 7/31/2007 10:02:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Guilty pleasures

The recent edition of Time magazine features authors and their guilty pleasures - books they read gratuitously, books they read for mere consumption of words. One author cheekily replied that the problem with asking him about guilty pleasures is that he's "pretty sure every pleasure is a guilty one".

I have to agree with him, cheeky as he might be.

Jane smiley's: Marquis de Sade's Justine
Tina Brown's: Holly Peterson's The Manny
Alexander McCall Smith's: (I'm actually pretty disappointed that this is his guilty pleasure but let's not judge before I read) Dick Francis' Under Orders
Joyce Carol Oates': Mad magazine
Anne Lamott's:(she seemed to have a lot of guilty pleasures) Don DeLillo's Falling Man, Helen Schulman's A Day at the Beach, Sara Miles' Take this Bread: A Radical Conversion

Oh and she said that Schulman's book makes her "feel physically ill with jealousy" that she did not write it (but physically ill in a good way, she emphasized)

Margaret Drabble's: Jules Verne's 20000 Leagues
Under the Sea (this I make a mental note to read sometime in the future. This book was mentioned in Crichton's Sphere and I'm really really curious).

Nathan Englander's: Batya Gur's Literary
Murder
Martha Southgate's: Stephen King's Carrie
Janet Evanovich's: (I think she lacks imagination) Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Susanna Moore's: Kathleen Winsor's Forever Amber (apparently it was banned at the time of its publication in 1944 because it was deemed "obscene and offensive")
Pete Hamill's: Bomba the Jungle Boy at the Giant Cataract
Bernard-Henri Levy's: David Goodis' The Wounded and the Slain, Horace McCoy's They Shoot Horses, Don't They?

Ben Okri's: Alexandre Dumas' The Three Musketeers

Now he mentioned something very interesting. Let me quote him

"Over the years, I've found it harder to enjoy the trashy reading I used to enjoy as a kid. I've been corrupted upwards by quality. I really wish I could recover that lost, shameless, youthful delight in fiercely trashy books. But the Three Musketeers is a hold out. It has survived"

Ok my very first english book is R.L Stine's. One that was embarrassing to admit. It was what the kids at my language centre read and I kind of followed suit (blindly, now that I have the clear head to think about it)

And then somehow I developed the sense to realise that it was all crap and moved on to K.A Applegate's Animorphs (I was even excited that Nickelodeon made a movie out of the sequels. It turned out that I was getting excited over nothing, because like with any great books, the movie is a somewhat a downgraded version that doesn't do justice). I guess if you ask me, Animorphs would be one of my many guilty pleasures.

Sure they're not exactly literary materials (otherwise, it won't exactly be guilty pleasure will it?) but for books that are designed for teenagers ( ehem, a certain trashy teenage book I have mentioned above comes to mind) its plot is quite ingenious. It has accompanied me through a great part of my adolescence to the point where the adult me who thought I've grown out of it got curious enough to order the last book of the sequel.

My other guilty pleasures will be Herge's the Adventures of Tintin.

Somewhere along I've also picked up Tamora Pierce's sequels: Protector of the Small.

The problem with me admitting that they're my guilty pleasures is that I believe they have survived the test of time for a reason and I simply cannot admit that they are trashy.

Ok, to be fair this is what I consider trashy novels: any books by Dan Brown (I'm not even a religious zealot who's particularly sensitive about the religious issues he brings - I'm a free thinker for crying out loud. His idea is intriguing sure, but I think he writes trashy novels for the simple reason that he cannot write. He can stoke the fire with his plot but he cannot sustain the fire; it dies somewhere, a long way before the books ends -unfortunately. A tragic death for a book in my opinion)

Now, I apologise if any of you likes his work,it is simply my personal opinion that he writes trashy novels and I do not intend to impose my opinion on you. If you feel pretty defensive, I suggest you stop reading this.

Another trash which is literally a literary garbage incarnate: any works by Judith Gould and Daniel Steel. I would like to say I'm sorry if you read any of these and take offence at what I wrote about them being junks and all but then again, I do not think I'm sorry at all, I mean: HOW CAN YOU READ THIS SHIT???!!!! ARE YOU BLIND??

I'm sorry but I think you should be ashamed.

I do not normally indulge in literary snobbery such as this because I am less than qualified; but when it comes to those two I can't help myself: Jesus, they're too trashy to be published.

Ben Okri's right. We can be corrupted upwards by quality, so I suggest if you like trashy things, upgrade yourself and before long you can see the trashiness shining out of the novels you used to read with such glaring clarity that I'd be saved the trouble of having to point it out to you. Corrupt yourself upwards please.

I admit that I am biased against American writers. I used to read John Grisham but over the years I found him to be dreary and dull. American writers just lack the wit, depth and charisma of their British/Irish/Scottish/Spanish counterparts. The only American writer whose books I still faithfully read is Michael Crichton.

Try reading Angela's Ashes.

My first infatuation with irish novel.

Grinning Goat at 7/29/2007 07:39:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Foul play

Luck has never quite been on her side. Sometimes I think even that is an understatement. I mean if I were to be a little less optimistic and a bit more crude, I would say that luck is fighting teeth and arms to be away from her.

The thing I admire about her is that she still stands tall when I would have just dwindled into nothingness, suffered from severe mental imbalance and freaked people out in the process. What held her up must be some pretty strong glue. Not the kind of

material I'm made up of obviously.

And sometimes I think that when these things happen, they sort of choose to manifest themselves in people like her. People with glue. Because, imagine if they happen to everyone (what a miserable crap of a world that is) then people like me would be eliminated and there'll hardly be enough people left to reproduce and re-populate the world. A barren land.

I do not mean that she deserves it, of course she does not (even if she does, she would have deserved it less. I would have deserved it more). It's not a matter of retribution.
I think it just happens to her because she's built of a different material. That she could handle it the way I couldn't.

That the reason it happens to her is because she won't succumb to it.

That you won't be tested on things you don't have the ability to cope for.
That the bar for people like her is higher. A different standard. A league of her own.

That the test is fair. No, wait is it?
If it happens to you, would you say it's fair that you sit for the harder paper just because you're more intelligent? I think not. But if you're a bystander, wouldn't you say that it's good that the more intelligent sit for the harder paper, because potential is developed by stretching your limit, isn't it?

Well then if you're not sitting for the harder paper doesn't that mean you have little potential? That's very hard to swallow.

It's like a bargain, no?
If you're made of better materials, you'll sit for the harder test.
If you're having it easy, you'll come down with the realization that you're not exactly top notch materials.

Ignorance is bliss I'd say. Sometimes when you think too much, it won't take long for you to come to the conclusion that this world is a bleak bleak place.

Grinning Goat at 7/25/2007 11:43:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

THE HANDSOME MEN



This is the picture of. Hmm I don't even want to tell you who this picture is supposed to represent.

Bald man and a gangster uncle-style. The fashion statement of the day.

Grinning Goat at 7/25/2007 10:05:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

SOMEONE SAVe me

Regina: eh I saw this cute guy and girl on the mrt today
Chikuen: but today I didn't take the mrt leh

Chikuen: I laugh sometimes, but you guys are crazy ah -always laughing. It's like it's CONSTITUTIVELY EXPRESSED.

Somehow that sent me into fits of laughter I just had to go to the toilet to hide my face that's gone so traitorously red from all the blood rush to the head.

Ok this is one of those funny analogy people told me that usually is remembered out of context. But anyway JT was trying to explain to me about polyclonal antibodies.

He said, if he's the antigen, and the whole lab is an army of anti-JT then the whole lab is polyclonal although each person in the lab recognizes only one part of him, so if Chikuen recognise the head, she won't recognise the arm.

R: Chikuen, so you won't recognize the arm ah?
Chikuen: no la, that's your spot what.

R: AHHHHHHH INNOCENT SOUNDS BAD. INNOCENT=STOOPID
Regina: innocent is supposed to have positive connotations
R: aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh I dont wanna be innocent I want to be GUILTY
Regina: u mean guilty of making so much noise in the lab? hauahahaha I share your guilt then
R: NOT ONLY SHARE LA that one, you're like the MAJOR SHAREHOLDER

Grinning Goat at 7/24/2007 10:25:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Monday, July 23, 2007

*BLING BLING*

Once you've heard my story, you'd reflect back on the title and think: how fitting. Huahahaha.

P: Do you want to buy the jacket or not?
G: wait (putting on jacket to try)
R: (stare)
G: teacher, don't look at me I feel like a porn star
R: do you mean to say I look perverted?

When I told this incident to someone, the conversation inadvertently turned to a story about a student who took an indecent picture of her teacher when she bent down and exposed her hips. Well my students may be a little crazy but they are most definitely not rude people. If I sound like a proud parent, that's probably because in a way, I am - a proud mentor. You can not have a lot of things in the world, the one thing you cannot not have is manners.

In manners lie not only the badge of respectability you owe yourself but also the zealously guarded prestige of generations preceding you.

Anyway the barbeque was yesterday. Great fun. Great company.

This is something to remember Chikuen by for when after I graduate: the look on her face when our ring tone was changed to: RRRRRRR MESSAGE FROM THE DARK SIDE THERE IS.
Gosh that was just the most explosive laughter, so explosive you have to try your hardest just not to pee while you're at it. HUAHAHAHAHAHA

"it's only fun until someone gets shocked... and then it's HILLARIOUS"

Grinning Goat at 7/23/2007 10:55:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Rotten jelly leg

My leg is a rotten jelly, it couldn't carry me from Lido to DFS. Traitorous bastards, I think they are where all the fats go and yet they couldn't do this simple thing called running. Well, they could actually but most of the time, not fast enough and most definitely not as fast as the rate they get sore.

I need to take up some martial arts class because in case of an attack, that would be my best bet as running clearly, is not an option.

This is probably my silliest philosophical proposition yet but I thought for a moment there that life is SUCH a combination of effort and luck.

If this old man wasn't kind enough to hold the bus driver, I wouldn't have made it. That's luck. But if I didn't run, this old man kind as he might be, wouldn't know that I was trying to catch this bus and wouldn't have hold the bus driver. That'seffort.

I had this thought once, just as any atheist would I suppose: if there's a higher power that is all omnipotent, one who would rather us not do bad things then it could've just stopped us from doing it instead of letting us choose and by doing so expose us to temptation we're bound to fall into. That is like an entrapment, isn't it?

If you're not given a choice, you couldn't and so wouldn't do bad things. By giving us a choice, we're being seduced into doing bad things, which as nature dictates usually gives us more pleasure. We shouldn't be blamed for seeking pleasure, should we? (isn't pleasure a good thing? What is so wrong for wanting a good thing?) and yet we are blamed for doing the bad things that will give us pleasure. It's said to be the good things that have gone wrong; and this share of the blame, it is what is conveniently labeled as sin.

That was what I thought. The answer to that I discovered, is really quite simple (This may not be the universal answer but at least it is one that sits well with me)

The higher power must have valued the freedom of will above having a sinless society. It rather gives us free will, even at the risk of having us make all the wrong choices because it deems freewill worth the risk.

It's all about value. Perhaps that is why I can accept this explanation. Because I understand that if one bag of 25g of peanuts cost $5 and one bag of 50g of peanuts cost $8, I would go for the $8 bag (and all the better if this bag is the promotional item of the month, me being the cheapskate shopper that I am).

We're allowed the opportunity to be sinful and in this way we're allowed the benefit of education. It is through the pitfalls of failure we appreciate the value of effort. That all is not luck and game in life.

We don't sail in uncharted water exactly. The destination is there but it is dynamic. The direction you take depends as much on how you set the sail as it depends on the wind. Effort. And a little bit of luck.

Grinning Goat at 7/22/2007 01:23:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Friday, July 20, 2007

The multiplication table

There used to be one chikuen. And with our arrival now the effect is chikuen times three. Synergistic you might call it. Huahahahaa. God I couldn't hold my laughter in place today we had to go to the other end of the lab to laugh it out before we all exploded.

Regina: I prefer the old hood
Chikuen: whoah you're a conservative ah, you like old stuff
Regina: ya lah that's why I like you mah


It seemed that nowadays my abs is trained more than my legs and any other body parts for that matter.

Grinning Goat at 7/20/2007 01:00:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

The greatest accomplishment in social skills

To reprimand without reprimanding. Isn't that amazing? Oxymoronically amazing.
I shall bear that in mind.

Grinning Goat at 7/20/2007 12:45:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Ahmmm

MY: Regina, your name is too long lah. Do you have a shorter version?
Regina: You can call me reg
R: You mean 3 syllables is maximum?
MY: yeah
R: ahmm actually when I call chikuen it always comes out as chikuen ah, so that's 3 syllables too
MY: hauahahaa

Grinning Goat at 7/20/2007 12:39:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

snippets

My grade in lab according to Mr.Joe:

Consistency: 19/20 (and later he silently added: of error. Consistency of error )
Patience: 2/20
Laughter: 30/20 (hauahahaha to this I pointed out that if Im a 30, then regina must be a 100)

Grinning Goat at 7/17/2007 11:44:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

The pain of my uncut finger

I almost lost my finger to the microtome blade today. Almost. Me keeping my finger and me losing it is only separated by one powerful word that is 'almost'. A step away but separated by a continent of difference.

This incidence; it unsettles me.

Because before, when I was first taught to cut section, I had this vision (or perhaps 'vision' is too distastefully prophetic), this disturbing imagery of me severing my fingers and blood dripping that kept my eyes on the blade. And now that my finger was millimeters away from neuronal death, I could almost feel the pain. You know how those people who lose their arm sometimes have sensations at the joint of the missing arm, as though the arm is still attached there? I could almost feel the pain of my uncut finger.

I swam to numb the feeling but the water was not cold enough. It couldn't numb my skin and it certainly didn't numb my fear.

Dr.Lim gave me some very wise advice about safety in the workbench afterwards, not unkindly. She said she did not want to have to explain to my parents about severed fingers. I for one wouldn't want to have to explain to my parents about severed fingers. I wouldn't even want to have to explain to myself about it.

I just had to tell people what happened. It's as though telling them would make it real. It would make my intact finger feel real.

R: I almost severed my finger today
Cheryl: God. What did you do? jgn buang2 daging sembarangan (don't throw away your flesh for nothing), we have enough meat for the barbeque ok.

Somehow, that was comforting at some level.

I'd like to end with this quote, adapted from a novel by Alexander McCall Smith.
"We can lay these ghosts to rest if we go about it in the right way. The important thing is to understand the thing itself. To see it for what it really is so we'd be able to approach the future as a friend, without a wardrobe of excuses"

Grinning Goat at 7/17/2007 10:20:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Monday, July 16, 2007

Incontinence of the will

Akrasia.

The weakness of the will. You know what's good for you but you just can't do it; you're too weak.

Does the weakness of the will make sense? Surely if we do something, then that means that we want to do it. And if we want to do it, then that means that must be because we think that it's in our best interest to do it.

And if we always do what we want all the time, then is there such a thing as a weakness of the will?

This though is counterintuitive for me. I just believe in akrasia in ways I can't explain.

Grinning Goat at 7/16/2007 12:32:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Breathing down my neck

Ok apparently my students LIKE being talked about here. God knows why.
If they don't remember the things I said in class, they at least remember what I said about them here (there goes their precious memory space for this kind of nonsense hauahahaa, uhmm kids: HINT HINTTTTT).

Yes so ahmm today's class was as noisy as ever (which when I come to think about it is probably why they gave us classroom C; because the noise would be INSULATED by cl
assroom B)

Having been a student myself I can recall incidences where I could actually remember the analogy given by a mentor but NOT the real thing the analogy is supposed to represent (which I admit, makes the analogy rather useless). But it's the next step that's worth the effort of remembering silly analogies (I suppose 'effort' is not quite the correct word to use because one does not expend much energy remembering silly things). You'd learn to remember the real thing, eventually.

G: teacher, you're BLUSHING
R: I am NOT
G: yes, you're all red
R: Don't put colour to my face
G: TEACHER IS BLUSHINGGGGG HAHAHAHAHA

You know, the part of your body that is most traitorous is probably your face.

Grinning Goat at 7/15/2007 11:22:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

The celebrities of your hey day

Ahh yes by popular request, I'm uploading this picture. They are as decribed by the title of this entry. And if you look carefully, you'll notice at the background there's schematic diagram of a heart so we must have been on the topic of Transport in Mammals.



Grinning Goat at 7/15/2007 11:13:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Chickadee

Okay something funny happened the other day when we were shopping for food for our lab's presentation.

CK was looking at the packaging of this snacks called chickadee

CK: ohhh it's this guyyy. Don't you know? the song goes like this (humm humm)
All of us:...(akward silence)
CK: (looking at us for signs of recognition or even of acknowledgment but finding none)
BZ: generation gap lah

Grinning Goat at 7/15/2007 08:48:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Ahm

I just remembered this conversation we had the other day. The day of the presentation where I had the chance to poison everyone with my apple pie. Last wednesday.

CK: this pie, you put cinnamon in it ah?
R: yeah, why are you allergic to it?
CK: no, sorry to spoil your plan ross

Grinning Goat at 7/15/2007 01:43:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Saturday, July 14, 2007

A compliment I would carry to bed

I never dreamt of being compared to C.S Lewis. Where I am now, I deem it unworthy. But a friend told me this today: one thing u and him have in common, is the sarcastic edge, and u should be proud, i think u share some similarities with cs lewis!

So even if the similarities end at that tad bit she referred to as a sarcastic edge, I would take this compliment to sleep.

Grinning Goat at 7/14/2007 01:25:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Friday, July 13, 2007

IS MY SAFETY YOUR RESPONSIBLITY?

I had a thought about education today. As usual, my normal lab routine triggers some stroke of inspiration. But I'm going to go by emotion, because writing this is most definitely cathartic for me so I'm going to tell it like it is.

My sisters and I, we went for a swim and because of some unforeseen circumstances (wedy would argue otherwise but that's irrelevant here) wedy had to come back late and so our swimming trip has to be postponed until after 10. Now, for your information the lights in pool get switched off at 10 every night. While we were on our way to the pool, we were accosted by this unsightly, repugnant and obese security guard who told us, in quite these few words: no swimming after 10 ah, you can sit but you cannot swim (gesticulating, making an even more unsightly motion of fish swimming), you understand? Understand ah? Cannot swim.

Let me recall, did I ever told you that the security guard is my parent? Did I ever mention that even my parents do not talk to me in such a manner?

I didn't describe that security guard as unsightly, repugnant and obese for his mere looks (nobody is ever to be blamed solely for being ugly). As for obeseness, I have nothing against obese people -I'm not exactly model material myself- but I DID think that security guard should at least be FIT, shouldn't they? Security guard shouldn't have to depend on a bicycle to make his rounds like this man did. In the case of a theft, is he going to ask the man in the black mask to hold it for a minute while he goes to get his bike?

Another thing is on manners. My sisters were indignant and so was I because this man talked to us, in my sister's words "like we're from ITE". Now let me correct any misconception. I do not imply that ITE students are anywhere below us, I am implying that THAT is the society's stereotypic view of them and I am saying that perhaps the reason why some ITE students are feeling rebellious is because they are often talked to in such a manner. To be honest, I felt like swimming MORE, AFTER he talked to me than before.

If I know that people are going to think I'm stupid no matter what I do, my first instinct is to just be stupid. Isn't being stupid easier? And besides, there wasn't any expectation to begin with. No hope to raise.

We went to swim anyway. And (no surprise there) the man came back. With the gall to SHINE TORCHLIGHT INTO OUR FACES.

I'd like to point out a few things.

1) I have always believed that people who have little authority over their lives compensate for it by exerting a little extra of it elsewhere. In the case of this man (let me BE stereotypical for a while), he probably has a daughter who ran away from home and so he seeks pleasure in controlling people who like to swim at night with the light off.

2) I thought his bad manners end with the little peptalk. Oh but no, there's THE TORCHLIGHT to boot. While he caught us swimming in the pool, he said to this guy on his walkie talkie (LOUDLY and IN OUR PRESENCE), "there are 3 girls swimming. One of them is probably resident and the other two don't know who"

3) Oh what a CONVENIENT ASSUMPTION that one of us is resident, and the others just some freeloaders. Seriously, if I'm going to freeload from someone, I'd at least make sure I swim while the light is on, wouldn't you??

4) He called this other guy with a tie to come in. The guy with the tie had the decency to ask us if we could please leave, politely. Being polite, that isn't so hard, is it? You can have a bad english (as this obese security guard obviously has) and be polite at the same time. There's no language barrier to politeness.
So we told this guy with the tie that we would leave soon. Before he left, I told him that I would appreciate it if the security guard does not talk to us in such a condescending manner and shine torchlight on our faces like we're some criminals.

5) What drove me to the edge was the half-assed reason he gave us for forbidding us to swim after 10. He mentioned regulation, now regulation is there for a reason is it not? I honestly cannot see a logical explanation for this.

No barbequing after 10. That's reasonable, because while you barbeque you deal with flammable materials and fire once set can spread and endanger other people. But if I were to drown, are you going to drown just because I drown? I don't recall drowning being contagious unless maybe in a not so near future where drowning might be fashionable to do.

Gymn closed after 10. That's reasonable because you need to lock up the gymn at some point, not so much for the safety of the users, more like for the safety of the treadmills and such.

No swimming after 10. Ok, so the light must be off at 10 to conserve electricity. But I'm not even asking for the light to be switched back on, I'm perfectly contented to swim in the dark with my sisters. So why am I banned from swimming again?
I don't disturb the other residents, it's not like I'm going to sing while I'm in the water and create a lot of noise. It's not like we were laughing loudly either.

6) So they worry about me drowning. It's nice to know that they take my safety into consideration but, is it like they're going to know (and hence save me on time) if I drown in the day but not at night? I think it's the exact opposite. It's MUCH safer to swim at night what with this certain security guard on his bike trying eagerly to catch people swimming after the light's out. Oh, and even if I were to drown during the day, do you seriously think this security guard can save me? I doubt he can even swim. And without his bike, he won't be able to call for help in time so I'll die either way.

7) Do you think they ban swimming after 10 simply because it's much more CONCISE to say "No activities in all the facilities after 10" rather than "Gym and barbeque pit closed after 10, swimming pool open at all times"??? I am highly suspicious that this is the case.

8) Now I'd like to apportion the blame accordingly. I do not blame the guard for this stupid rule. It's not his job to make them, it's his job to enforce them whether he believes in the rules or not. I blame him for his lack of manners. I have very low tolerance for people who patronize me, my family or my friends for that matter.

9) In the old days, they used to say, "the lights will be switched off after 10, you can still use the facilities if you want but your safety will be your own responsibility". Now THAT's reasonable. I prefer the old management.

10) If they're worried about strangers sneaking in at night to have a free swim that's just a ridiculous excuse. It is ridiculous not because it is impossible that some people do that but it is ridiculous because that security guard clearly said that we can SIT even if we cannot swim. So, do you reckon it is okay for a stranger to sneak in and sit even if they don't swim? A trespasser is a trespasser whether he swims or not. Gosh, you don't even have to worry about a terrorist sneaking in to plant a bomb in the pool, it's the DRY LAND you should be worried about, not the pool.

I can go on and on all night but I really am freezing now. It's time to bathe.

Grinning Goat at 7/13/2007 10:38:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Monday, July 09, 2007

in control

I hate washing dishes, but that's part of the bargain so while I wait for the kitchen business to end (lord, have you ever tried an apple pie with milo as topping? Now, that's not the ideal way to make a pie but I guess it'll do when you're short of substances) I'll just jot down some stuff here.

Ingredients for my IRISH apple pie, according to Chikuen:

1. Irish apples
2. Irish flour
3. Irish eggs
4. Gula Melaka (Gula melaka that's the malaysian name, the indonesian name for that is gula jawa. It seems like people want to claim the sugar as their own no matter where you are)

Ahmm, she said "irish apple pie TIPU" huahahaahhaa.

Anyway I just want to say that people who are in control always have SUCH a flair.
There's no need for a recipe when you cook. There's no need for a manual when you operate a machine. There's no need for a written protocol for an experiment.

I see in my sister what I see in my lab officer and professor.

Grinning Goat at 7/09/2007 11:49:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Centro di gravita permanente

una vecchia bretone
con un capello
e un ombrello di carta
di riso e canna di bambu'
capitani coraggiosi
furbi contrabbandieri macedoni

gesuiti, eucridei
vestiti come dei bonzi
per entrare a corte degl'imperatori
della dinastia dei Ming

cerco un centro
di gravita' permanente
che non mi faccia mai cambiare idea
sulle cose e sulla gente
avrei bisogno di
over and over again

Per le strade di Pechino erano giorni di maggio
tra noi si scherzava a raccogliere ortiche
non sopporto i cori russi la musica finto rock
la new wave italiana il free jazz punk inglese
neanche la nera africana.

::

An old woman with a hat and an umbrella
of rice paper and bamboo cane
Couragerous captains
Clever Macedonian smugglers

Euclidean Jesuits
Dressed like Buddhist monks to go to the court
of the Emperors of the Ming dynasty.

I'm seeking a permanent center of gravity
That won't make me ever change my mind
About things, about people
I would need
over and over again

On the streets of Peking there were days of May
We joked among ourselves gathering nettles
I can't stand Russian choruses, fake rock music,
the Italian New Wave, free jazz, English punk, nor even the black African.

Grinning Goat at 7/08/2007 08:19:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

On the subject

Ok, on the subject of losing wallet I was just thinking that there were times when you lose some degree of consciousness and do things on autopilot. Like the time when you lock the door and a couple of minutes later ask someone if you've locked it (usually on the bus where it's already unsalvagable).

You just zonked out for a while and yet physically usually you're doing exactly what you have to do. I like to think of this as a loophole in memory - a blind spot if you'd want to call it- and this is exactly the spot where you lose things and are unable to recall the steps you took. Which was what happened with my wallet incident.

I thought it possible not to zonk out like that. By being self-conscious all the time. Conscious of where your wallet is at all times and so being conscious of what you lose at the time you lose them, which makes them really convenient to find.
But it's really tiring, isn't it?

Anyway I'm just really pissed. That's all.

Grinning Goat at 7/08/2007 01:14:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Saturday, July 07, 2007

Food for thought

Food for thought. Food. I shouldn't be thinking about food. That's a bad title.

I guess this is a stupid complaint but it reminds me of my aunt. She sent a message telling a story and then at the end of the sms "she said sorry I wrote there on top 'bsing' when it should've been 'bring'" when all along she could've just scrolled up and correct it there and then. An sms isn't like a magazine where you cannot unprint a circulation and so you have to write the correction the next day, is it?

Anyway I was trying to extend my afternoon nap but found that I could not. I guess what I was trying to do was to put my sleeping time into a sort of a deposit box so my excessive deposit today would spill over to tomorrow where I know there is bound to be deficit. But of course a long time ago my father told me that's the most rubbishy thing he's ever heard (not counting the stories insurance company tell to persuade him to sign up of course).

You can't sleep 20 hours today and not have any the next day, you'd make yourself dizzy on both days and screw up your day-light cycle. I understand that but against all that theory, a part of me still thinks that if you sleep just a little bit more on one day, you'll withstand the lack of sleep better the next day. Maybe I'm just psychologically greedy.

Seems like I'm going off tangent again. I apologise. What I want to talk about today actually is an extension of what C.S Lewis says about the whole human race being a single organism.

Is that concept possible? Are we really a single organism? And if we are, would we know?

I've thought about this and decided that there's no way we'd be able to tell even if we are, and so it should be possible in theory.

If you are a heart, would you know if the kidney is failing? I guess you would know if the failing heart results in a drop in blood pressure and so you, as the heart needs to work harder to compensate for the drop. This is the same way as how you would know that the way somebody you know does things will affects you personally. For example your friend is caught stealing and you're forced to bail him out.

You can also think of this in terms of what you have to do for the public good. The heart needs to pump harder so the blood pressure can be raised and you know that this is good for the entire organism because you want to avoid circulatory shock which is fatal. In the same way, you know that you need to conserve the environment because it is good for the whole planet. Regardless of what the big corporations do with their carbondioxide emissions, you could start using recycled paper and in this small way contribute less to the green house gases. The avoidance/slowing down of global warming is the public good here.

(I have to admit the examples I give above have something to do with today being the 7th of July 2007 - the live earth campaign. And yes, I wore green today. Just the pants, because apparently I don't own a single green t-shirt. And I have to say that the logo channelnewsasia in green is just so charming they should just stick to it instead of returning to their original color).

But if you're a heart and this stranger is a hair follicle, would you as a heart know if you, as an organism is balding? I suppose you wouldn't. Now I am not trying to say that some humans are less important than others the way a heart is surely more essential than a hair follicle.

I'm just trying to illustrate incidences where you think that how other people are doing doesn't concern you in any way because you don't know them. How african children are undernourished doesn't concern you, you said you don't cause the problem and how they're doing doesn't affect you (goodness of the heart aside). What if it actually does on a larger scale and that you simply cannot see it?

I'm saying self-consciousness only goes so far. There are some things you can tell and some you cannot and when you cannot, it doesn't mean they don't exist, does it?
There's no way to prove it as much as there's no way to disprove it.
I guess to me this is exactly where the existence of God stands. I can see why they call it 'faith'. Either you believe or you don't.

I think I have some comments on some of the other things he wrote too but let's leave that to another day. I have to go now.

Oh and I think I lost my wallet. CRAP CRAP CRAP. See the thing is, if i remember it correctly it should contain only about 10 dollars but it's the disturbing feeling of losing something that I utterly detest despite the material loss.

Grinning Goat at 7/07/2007 06:27:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Thursday, July 05, 2007

What they say and what they don't say

I've seen two things.

There was this lab officer I knew who commented that scientists exist to write journals. And although not exactly in these very words, this is my impression as I remembered him saying: Research moves science at the pace ants move a mountain.

I don't know about you but I think ants might just move mountain a lot faster than humans if they put their minds on it. With humans, you can't be sure of anything (as the saying goes, the only thing that's certain is death and tax).

You can't measure the speed at which research moves science based on what you do in the lab on a daily basis (see in my case, OF COURSE I can't quite see how culturing cells per se can help me find the cure to cancer). From the discovery of wheels to carriages to fuel-driven cars to rockets and aeroplanes. From mendelian genetics to the discovery of DNA to genetic engineering. The time period gets shorter and shorter. It may not be fast enough that you see everything in your lifetime. But it is fast, isn't it? It just operates on a different time scale.

I guess you need to look at people to whom research matters.

I have to say (and I'm keeping in mind that tomorrow I may find this too exaggerated and delete it) that being in Dr.Lim's lab it's an education. And I mean education in the true spirit of the word. Not simply a mind-numbing and blind swallowing of facts and scientific theory.

Grinning Goat at 7/05/2007 09:39:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Rehearsing

4th of July. That was yesterday and yesterday more than half the cohort graduated.
With cheery smiles and Linus the NUS lion soft toy in a toga. A soft toy that someone while they're still in NUS would never imagine they would buy but end up buying. I don't know, perhaps for sentimental reason.

NUS colour code is orange and blue, do you know? And what kind of fashion sense can you have wearing blue and orange? Well, it's precisely people like me who think like that who end up buying the NUS jacket. But that's another story.

Anyway I met everyone at the UCC. Smartly dressed in a toga, the degree scroll resting comfortably in their arms. Officially graduates now.

Cheryl and Jack who've sat through it all with me.

Gladys. This girl in my french class who can't wait to graduate to become a veterinarian.

Vanessa. I wouldn't have survived bioinformatics (trust me, it's worse than calculus) without her.

Joan.
My senior whom I can depend on to sort out my confusion with dilution factors in the lab. (the whole lab people was there, even Dr.Lim. And Shera seemed surprised that she was. I guess the correct indo expression for this would be guru yang merakyat. I took a picture with my lab officer. She asked me 'you're graduating ah?' Obviously not, I'm simply rehearsing for next year hauahaha)

Riz. This brunaian swimmer who wore T-shirt that says 'I'd rather be here' in the lecture theatre. How very inappropriate. I'd rather be in bed to be honest.

Suhaila. Actually I forgot that's her name. I always thought of her as this crazy girl who made me laugh a lot. She really is crazy you know.

Aisha. I never realise she's that tall. Maybe people look taller on their graduation day.

The other cheryl. I always confused the two and sent the wrong sms dammit.

Marmar Marimar. She's practically brimming with pride that day so I took a picture with her for good luck haha. Just to make sure I graduate next year you know.

Oh and there's this girl I knew since year 2, whose name I can never remember, who managed to fool me for a good ONE YEAR. Apparently she's NOT taiwanese and how did I find out? it's like this:

Shera: that's the malaysians taking picture together
R: except for that taiwan girl
Shera: she's malaysian too
R: WHATTT?
::
R: you, you are MALAYSIAN la taiwan girl
Taiwan girl: no la I'm from taiwan
R: pi hua (literally translated to buttock words and I have always thought this expression apt since buttock word is like a fart, isn't it? insignificantly bullshitty)
Taiwan girl: (to Shera) you shouldn't have told her
Shera: well, you forgot to conspire with me
R: (to taiwan girl) you know shera ah?
Taiwan girl: yea, since year one
R: how come?
Taiwan girl: she's friendly mah

=,=

Shera: heyyyyyyy you're graduating!!
this guy I don't know (must be her friend): yeahhhhhhh I hope you graduate too next year
Shera: HOPE??? I WILL laaaaaaa

::

A lot of people are graduating. NUS hasn't failed as an institution. For once I'm actually perfectly contented to still be there. A part of the institution. And I may not agree with this all the time but for now I would admit that NUS is my comfort zone.

Grinning Goat at 7/05/2007 08:58:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Monday, July 02, 2007

My my

Ohhh I know where the petrol station is; I just don't know what petrol my car uses. HUAHAHAHAHAHA

Grinning Goat at 7/02/2007 11:14:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

My pet pet

I asked my lab officer this morning while the boss was around, " OI CHI KUEN WHAT'S YOUR MSN?" and she gave me a killer look hauahahahaa.

Oh and yes I got a pet pet today.
Two actually, I got one last week but forgot all about it. It's called Raji.
It needs to be looked at, counted, fed and washed. Better than tamagotchi, you reckon? My pet pet can even produce babies at a wild rate. Maybe next time I'll pick a pet less malignant.

Oh something embarrassing happened last friday. I was blasting my music and was contributing a little sound wave of my own to the environment when I heard this voice on top of mine so I lowered the volume a little. Someone was shouting, clearly.

R: WHAT?
This someone at the opposite building: DON'T STOP. SING AGAIN
R: YOU CAN HEAR IT FROM THERE? GOSHHH I AM SO SORRY
The crazy neighbour: NO, SING AGAIN. ANOTHER SONG. WHY DO YOU THINK I STAND AT MY BALCONY?
R: ERHH.........
The crazy neighbour: COME ON SING. I'M DEPRESSED.

You know, if that was his reverse psychology to stop me, it bloody worked.

Grinning Goat at 7/02/2007 08:50:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}