Tuesday, August 30, 2005

F.A.T.E (Freakin Arrangement That Eats you alive)

I stepped on dog poo this morning but I suppose that doesn't count.

I was staying up almost the whole night last night to finish up this poster (due date today) and there was simply no time to read my french stuff for today.
And I seriously was TRAUMATISED by today's class.

To think that the first time I skipped pre-reading the text I was swamped by Mr.Doumeq who shoved french grammar down our throat in a very threatening manner should tell me something shouldn't it?

ANyway I wasn't really that firm a believer of fate but several things happened today.

1) There was Karol who said something along the line "Don't be too grouchy over French" just before I came to that traumatising class

2) There was me asking Rosli if I could go in the middle of band practice and then there was me boarding this bus 95 and then there was me apologising to this guy because I accidentally sat on his bag and then there was someone calling me inside the bus (someone from my french class) then there was this conversation out of nowhere.

My friend was practically flashing her french textbook (which cost a bomb for such a shitty book by the way) in front of me.

R: WHat about it?
G: The nightmare!
R: Huahahaha yehh


ANd thennnn this guy beside me whose bag I just accidentally sat on suddenly turned asking me WHY french is such a nightmare.

I answered without thinking "We are taught french grammar in french"

And in a way, I deserved this in return for answering without thinking,"Is that not supposed to be the way?"

And then he decided that short conversation simply wouldn't do and proceeded to ask me what I was going to do about this whole nightmare business. In his words, "So what are you going to do about it? You can't be having nightmares every night..."

What are the odds of me boarding this bus that my friend from french class also boarded and that she happened to flash her french textbook at me and that I happened to sit in this cursed place with this guy that happened to speak french and who happened to be so damn proud about it he couldn't help but to defend the language when people accused it of being nightmarish?

What are the odds of that happening???

If that wasn't bleeding F.A.T.E I don't know what was.

The question though was still the same old "what am I going to do about it"

So God help me.

Grinning Goat at 8/30/2005 12:46:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Read the questions, kids

Kids can be so blind to a comprehension passage. It's like they don't read the questions.

Question: Are all spiders dangerous?

Answer: No, they can kill.

1) How can it be a "NO" and "they can kill" at the same time?
2) That's really NOT the answer given in the passage
3) How can they blindly believe all spiders can kill when they CLIMBED UP THE TABLE TO CATCH A SPIDER IN THE AIR-CONDITIONER JUST A MINUTE AGO???

READ THE QUESTIONSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, kidssssssss

Grinning Goat at 8/28/2005 12:28:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Two ninjas

5 cavities.

My front teeth were supposedly sensitive. I opted to have them anaesthesised.
The result was this feeling of carrying a chunk of meat in your lips, like a body part you don't really own. I always thought this was what it'd feel like to be born with cleft lips.

Anyway.

The seat was inclined at such obtuse angle it's almost horizontal. And what happened when the seat was horizontal was that there's nowhere your saliva can flow and considering what they sucked out wasn't even half of what I produced (didn't know I was such a saliva factory) they made it pretty hard for me to say a word much less answer the doctor's question.

My old dentist didn't use to make me sit in this sleeping position. Must have something to do with the dentist's height. They just don't make em tall anymore.

I think there's something about people in masks. (there must be a reason why people are so obssesed with BAtman and Zoro). Having two eyes staring at me (ahem my teeth) for a good 45 minutes made me want to stare back.

I was looking at this tiny reflection of my teeth when something squirted out onto my face. Patients simply shouldn't sit in a horizontal position...
It was like having two ninjas conspiring over my face (literally) to knock all my teeth out.

The dentist had a good eye. (I mean she better be if she's drilling away like that and doing it on my face)
In fact the eye's so good it was disappointing to see her open the mask because then it kind of destroyed my imagination of what the mouth and nose should be like.

Grinning Goat at 8/24/2005 03:19:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, August 21, 2005

You don't control your teacher that way

1. By pointing the remote control for the air-conditioner to the teacher and said "teacher don't give homework"

2. By calling your teacher a BIG LIAR just because she forgot to buy sweets (which come to think of it is something you DESERVE because you waste her liquid correction pen)

3. By playing hide and seek during class time

You DON'T control your teacher that way kids.

Grinning Goat at 8/21/2005 12:36:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Friday, August 19, 2005

The evil within

Two glass of water and a rainy day don't make a good combination. I was practically cursing everytime the bus stops.

Anywayyyyyyyyyy.

The evil within.

That's the difference between a kid and an adult. Not that I like kids but they certainly are happier because unlike adults, they don't have (well most of them anyway) what I call this ability to look into situation with a third person's eye.

A detached view that separates yourself from your first perpective.

Simple scenario would be something like seeing a friend betrays someone. That'll be your perspective. Your third eye would see something like: if he can betray someone, what makes you think he won't betray you.

You know basically this ability to see through layers of deception.

Recently I was browsing through this reading for a friend of mine.

The Quantum Hypothesis. It was full of technical details. Physics experiments I couldn't remember/didn't know about.

But what struck me was this:

"Thirty-five years ago Hermann von Helmholtz reached the conclusion that our perceptions provide, not a representation of the external world but at most only an indication thereof"

The implication of that, would be that we have NO GROUNDS on which to make a comparison between the actualities of the external effects and those of the perceptions ptovoked by them.

All ideas we form of the outer world are ultimately only reflections of our own perceptions.

Imagine the human race as a bunch of blind people. Born blind and live the rest of their lives without vision. What they perceive of this world would then be limited to for example the auditory sensors. How would anyone explain what is vision to them??

The concept of vision would be incomprehensible to most people.

We can't assume our perceptions are right because we'll never for sure find out if the sensory we have is exhaustive. That there's no other form of perceptions available in the universe. Which is impossible, if not unlikely.

Do you know what is the problem with this realization?

Scientists have been trying time and again to find natural laws. To figure out the way the world works. But whatever natural laws it is they managed to find, it will always be subjective to a human perspective.

You know, when they say "sky is the limit"? That's total bull. Sky can never be the limit because the determining factor is always the brain. Our perception of things.
It may be the one thing that separates human from animal but let's face it, it is also the one thing that becomes our stumbling block. Brain is our limiting factor.

We can never know the things our brain can't perceive.

So the question is, is there a point in trying to find natural laws and figure out the way the world works?? We know that in the end it may never be the real thing. That it is just a figment of our imagination in the sense that it's something that fits into our logical reasoning conveniently without regards to its actualities.

"Are not all so-called natural laws really nothing more or less than expedient rules with which we associate the run of our own perceptions as exactly and conveniently as possible?"

Are we to say that exact natural research have been fundamentally at fault from the beginning? That it is doomed to fail the moment it starts?

Because like what was said, it is impossible to separate the phenomena in external nature from those in human consciousness.

We will never find evidence that supports our theory without subjecting it to our own perspective first. You need to be God looking down and judge how close this human theory is to the real thing. You can't be you.

But I suppose God is fair. IF we can't prove it, neither can we disprove it without subjecting it to our own perspective (which proves to be impossible in the first place!).

"...still the more daring assertion cannot be disproved, that the assumed picture represents quite accurately actual Nature in all points without exception. For, to disprove this, one must be able to speak of actual Nature with certainty, which is acknowledge to be impossible"

But hypotheses are never shitty, as further they are to the real thing as they may be. Because we need an anchor point where we can begin to argue things, where we can bagin to understand things.


"One cannot be happy without a belief, at least belief in some sort of reality outside us. This undoubting belief points the way to the progressing creative power, it alone provides the necessary point of support in the aimless groping; and only it can uplift the spirit wearied by failure and urge it onwards to fresh efforts."


" A research worker who is not guided in his work by any hypothesis renounces from the beginning a deep understanding of his own results"

In other words, if you don't believe in any belief, neither can you be convinced by a logical contradiction to the belief.

If you refuse to acknwledge that 2 times 2 = 4. How can you be convinced that 2 times 2 does not equal to 5?

No belief, no arguments.

No arguments, no new discovery.

Things will remain static.

But then again:

No belief, no arguments.

No arguments, things are peaceful.

But is everybody happy?

Grinning Goat at 8/19/2005 08:54:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, August 14, 2005

WHy audition shouldn't be an ego-stroking exercise

1) Because if you want to add morality to the equation, you'll then stand pretty far down the staircase to heaven

2) Because standard of auditionee differs from year to year. Some very good ones may come flocking in on one year and not make it in. Some average dodo happen to drop by in another year and pull off the audition for lack of people

3) Informing the band rejects is far from being an easy task. You might get swamped with mails in return. ("How come I wasn't told about the second audition? I think that is not fair to me!". The thing is, it doesn't feel that good to tell them that only those who pass the first audition proceeds to the second)

4) You need tact to tell these people without:

a) injuring their feelings; which -if you do- will bring me back to point 1)
b) killing their passion in whatever it is they do (singing/playing guitar/drums)


What IS the best way to tell them you failed the audition?
Banging on technicalities? explaining in details exactly what it is that make us reject them? Say "you're not suitable" (which to me sounds like a phoney reason people won't buy)

There's no easy way.

Grinning Goat at 8/14/2005 04:23:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Playing it the kiddy way

WHile I was in the midst of marking a pile of assignmets as usual, the kids became all noisy. Yaoxiong kept coming over to my table to either borrow some pen or liquid correction pen. (He even judged for me, the state each of my pen was in. There's this particular one that, according to him, I don't use often because of the lousy ink-flow rate or some nonsense like that)

I realised how they were wasting my liquid correction pen AFTER they managed to make THREE BUBBLES. My liquid correction pen was laid there in three messy white pool on the paper. With them shouting, "My baby....my baby..."

Apparently each bubble belonged to each of them and they were competing the buble to see whose bubble would burst first. The nonsense of it all. Wouldn't they ALL burst in the end anyway?

Heh but then again in a horse race you can ask the same question: Wouldn't all the horses reach the finishing line in the end anyway?

And in the same way, wouldn't all swimmers reach the other side of the pool in the end anyway?

Actually this reminds me of all the silly things kids play.

There are the:

1) Buying of cheap ( 10 cents worth) erasers, covered them all with a generous dollop of liquid correction pen and stuck em up the toilet's ceiling.

2) Colouring a paper, soaked it in water and stuck it up the ceiling. Believe me, this results generally in a highly decorated and COLOURFUL toilet's ceiling.

3) When you're in perfect health: Take a tissue paper, wipe your nose, run it by the tap and stick it up the ceiling.
When you're not exactly in the pink of health: Take a tissue paper, wipe your nose and immediately stick it up the ceiling.


I see that generally kids are highly inclined to participate in prettifying their school's toilet's ceilings.

Oh and have I mentioned that liquid correction pen is a very important toy in a kid's childhood? Make sure you don't deprive them of the chance of having one at the ready inside the pencil case.

It's okay not to bring your pen. But not bringing your liquid correction pen? God, that is a crime.

Grinning Goat at 8/13/2005 10:32:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Laughing behind closed doors

I apologise for the lack of updates.

I was too busy calling people up for audition and being forced to listen to techno on the phone line when the person (with the bad taste, might I add) refused to/didn't pick up my call.

Then there was the grumpy, "yeehhh???" afterwards, like you just woke him up from his beauty sleep. or the silent, sleepy "yea yea yea" like he's nodding along with you without really grasping the information I just gave (Which is TRUE because Ono said quite a couple of people called me back when I was in school, asking the very information I just gave them, which is the TIME AND VENUE of the audition, which really...makes you think if they have any intention of coming for the audition at all)

Of course there was the polite "Yes, Ross?". Not that I have a big ego and want people to chant my name every couple of minutes. It's more like it's nice to hear that the person on the other line is a person and not some yellow information-absorbing sponge who couldn't care less about the caller/carrier of information. In fact it's quite shocking (perhaps from the rarity of it) to hear that this particular auditionee actually remembered my name after the first time I called him for the first round of the audition. I always assume that people asking my name do so for formality's sake.

May you polite people pass through the audition. Amen.

Hah and they DID!

You know how sitting through an audition can be some kind of an ego-stroking exercise. But that's not why I'm writing this today.
My point is, whether the auditoners laugh or not, the fact remains:

You can be remembered (among the sea of auditionees) for two things, and two things only:

1) Because you have what it takes and make it through; OR
2) Because of something you DID during the audition

I shall refer to point 2.

I'll tell you what happened that make me laugh (practically all of us in the band do...) I'm sure I shared some of the sin for this but I'll add morality to the equation later, not now.

There was this guy who auditioned for vocals. Not exactly a great singer but decent enough. A little erhhh overdramatic in his expression might I say (I am ambivalent about having a dramapapa for a fellow vocalist but the other vocalist was laughing her ass off afterwards) It was like a broadway rip-off that didn't quite make it. AND THENNNNN during the tone test (that's when Dang played a random note on his guitar and the auditionees were expected to follow suit - the whole point is to check to see if they're tone-deaf)

Dang: (played a note)
Guy auditionee: (imitating the note)teng teng teng teng teng
Rosli: (Big-eyed)...
Dang: (played another note)
Guy auditionee: teng teng teng.....teng
Rosli: erhhh perhaps once is enough...because the more times you do it the easier it becomes...
Dang: (played another note)
Guy auditionee: teng teng
Rosli:...
Guy auditionee: sorry...it's a habit...
Dang: (played yet another note)
Guy auditionee: teng..tt......(swallowed)

You'd think this guy's auditioning for the chinese orchestra.

And then there was this guy with the PINK guitar who played the PINK phanter tunes. And amidst the large number of people auditioning for guitar this year (like Rosli pointed out, we can practically raised an army of guitarists) his name got lost during the follow up call for the second audition. (he was good by the way, despite his quirkiness with the all the pink stuff and we managed to find him in the end)

Anyway let me first clarify that I was the one doing the calling up for these people.

Yesterday he said this, "oh you mean this guy who called me last night?"

GGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

I'm having a voice box surgery one of these days.

And there was this drummer from heaven (from France actually) who could literally switch genre at his flick of his wrist. Amazing fill-ins. The beats loud and steady. It was mesmerizing to see him in action. He was not good in the "yea he passed the audition" way, he was good in the "HELL YEA HE'S IN" and the audition is just formality way. It was the first time everybody in the audition room clapped after an auditionee is done. The best I've seen so far. Obviously he's in. The last time I checked he was asking me where he can get a drum sticks since he didn't bring it from France.

Sometimes I think the gap is too wide. The best and the worst are MILES apart. Just like how my students are.

Which reminds me to end this entry because I need to go and teach those buggers.

Grinning Goat at 8/13/2005 12:11:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Strangers in the night

It's amazing what a year can do to you. A year and a lack in communication.

People change, do they not? So it's unsettling to have people point their fingers at you, asking if you're in some kind of trouble.

The fact is a year's enough to make people strangers. More than enough, because the moment you stop asking and people stop asking, there's this invisible barrier that goes higher by the days. And it's hard to get back to where you started.

Your value changes. People's value changes. And you start wondering if it still crosses after a while. Whether it does matter when it doesn't.

Sometimes I think it's the little details that keep people together, preventing them from losing touch. From becoming strangers. The mayonnaise of the sandwiches. The sausage of the bun. And people don't generally announce out loud the little details. It's like a little game of interrogation where you're not really aware that you're being interrogated. (May the best FBI agent win?)

Then you start talking about all the mundane things you can think of. And when you start talking about the weather you know that you're officially strangers. Congratulations.

Reunions always remind me of how much I've lost.

A lot.

And I don't see myself raising my finger to do a bloody thing about it. Who's up for a little game of scaling the Great Wall?

Grinning Goat at 8/10/2005 01:15:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Sunday, August 07, 2005

A giant dung bomb

(smiley face with a tinge of sadness)

"Teacher, how come you're not teaching us anymore?"
"Why? Isn't Ms.Tan back?"
"No, we had a new teacher"

That was the high point.

The low point. Would be when someone said he's going to quit. And you're under this illusion that he quits because of you.

The low point would be when the two taiwanese students announced that they would return to Taiwan next week and in the midst of marking a pile of assignments, the only response you can give is a mumble of an okay bordering on the pathetic even for a social retard.

Grinning Goat at 8/07/2005 01:08:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Pfffffff

I got locked out of my own phone. Stupid stupid me.

R: Ndri, what's a bloody PUK code?
Andri: You got locked out huh?
R: yeaaaaa
Andri: Huahahahahahahhahaha

But she's forgiven because she knew the way to fix it.

Kaka: You got locked out of your phone??
R: Yeaaaaaaaaa
Kaka: Huahahahahha it's like you're stealing your own phone

R:*muttering/cursing under my breath* ppfffffffff
Kaka: Ci, are you crying?
R: HUHHH????? WHY WOULD I BE????

But she's forgiven too because she called in some heavy firepower with a very POWERFUL singtel mobile customer service number. (Thanks Dree- I gave up using your screen name Nobody. It just confuses people...)

Ok guys, in the event your brain doesn't grow much and you retain a certain degree of stupidity in dealing with your own phone, here's the number to call to fix things:

1626

There. You shall be salvaged. (don't go to singtel and pay $26 for a re-set, silly)

While we're at it, I might as well give you some shit.

Pressing *#06# on YOUR mobile phone will produce its Imei number (Serial number) unique to each phone sooooo if some smart ass steals it, include the imei number in your police report for easy identification.

Pressing *#0000# on your mobile phone will give you its production date. Mine happens to be on 22 May 2004. Old for a dog, young for a phone. I hope.

Yeaaapppp so whatever you do, don't be so belligerent and insert the wrong code for three consecutive times, it will take you to a journey to Singtel 24 Hour hotline which is basically an answering machine (fully automated) and get bloody pissed because you thought the person on the answering machine has a phoney accent.

Grinning Goat at 8/06/2005 12:25:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Thursday, August 04, 2005

When the pun gets to you

Drummer: It's like there's no tension in the snare. It's not even screwed.
Dang: Screw it then

Drummer did something to the snare

Drummer: (hitting the snare) How about now?
Dang: It sounds more screwed.

Grinning Goat at 8/04/2005 01:11:00 AM pontificated

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{buzzz out}

Monday, August 01, 2005

Intro for Peru's essay.

When I was browsing through my hard disc I stumbled on this. Something I wrote for Peru's essay some time ago.

Nothing tests the strength of a human relationship like a calamity. Nobody defies nature at its worst. In times of dire need, bonds are sometimes forged, enmity momentarily forgotten. I always find unity in calamity an irony worth pondering. What are so intriguing are perhaps both our seemingly innate sense of obligation to help the helpless and our darker side – the curiosity fulfilled only by watching a tragedy unfolding from a third person's eye. Sometimes I think it's a thin line we're threading.

Grinning Goat at 8/01/2005 03:09:00 PM pontificated

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{buzzz out}